I'm so Heavy...

I’m wishing to be alone tonight
I’m wishing to shut the world out
Shut it down

I can’t take much more
I’ve broken the skin
I’ve taken the pain in

Screaming, lashing out
No one notices
No one cares

If I bleed, I bleed
If I cry, I cry
If I die, I die

Mentally exhausted
Rejected
Alone

Maybe there’s no making it now
Tired of trying
I’m not okay

Illusions of being wanted....

Your words like razor blades
slicing my skin
You really don't know how bad this
hurts
as the pain begins to sink in

I smile through the bleeding
and tell you I am always here
always your friend

Each time you push me down
I get back up again
You walk away
I follow

It's a sick game
forsaken to play forever
damned to be this way

Your harsh words like
angelic verses in my head

I take what I can get
so you throw me nothing but shit

I take what you give me and twist it
into gold
into hope
into love

When you want something so bad
you bend and break it
until it fills this void
completes this puzzle
slam it into place
it never quite fits
and soon it breaks into pieces

and then you start again with the next piece
hoping one day a piece might fit
and complete you